卡耐基教你如何给别人留下好印象

It's hard to be influential without making a lasting impression, hopefully in a positive way.如果你不能给别人留下长远的印象的话，想要制造正面的影响力是很困难的。Dale Carnegie devotes a major part of "How to Win Friends and Influence People in the Digital Age" to discussing exactly how you can impress people.戴尔-卡内基致力于研究“电子时代如何赢得朋友并影响别人”。Here are some highlights:以下是一些重点内容：1. Take interest in others' interests1.对别人的兴趣表示兴趣We are so busy today that it's difficult to make the time to get to know other people. Therefore, when you take the time to get to know someone else, they'll be grateful for that time.今天的我们工作太过忙碌，以至于很难有时间去了解别人。因此，当你花时间去了解别人的时候，他们会对你付出的时间感到感激。"Even if you are not actively involved in clubs, groups, or local organizations where face-to-face interactions are possible, there is still an abundance of opportunities to learn about others' passions and concerns," Carnegie writes." The bottom line is that you must become genuinely interested in others before you can expect anyone to be interested in you."“即使你没有很活跃地参加俱乐部、小组活动或是当地组织去进行面对面的交流，你还是有大把的机会去了解别人的热情所在的。”卡内基如此写道。“底线是在别人对你产生兴趣之前你必须对别人非常感兴趣。”2. Make an effort to smile2.努力微笑Even when different cultures come together, a smile always brings the same joy and happiness to everyone involved. This will make you more pleasurable to work with as well.即使是不同文化背景的人在一起，一个微笑也总能带来同样的快乐。也会让你在工作上显得更适合共事。"There is a simple reason for this phenomenon: when we smile, we are letting people know we are happy to be with them, happy to meet them, happy to be interacting with them," Carnegie says. "They in turn feel happier to be dealing with us."“这个现象有个简单的道理：当我们微笑的时候，我们会告诉别人我们很高兴和他们在一起，很高兴认识他们，很高兴和他们交流。”卡内基说，“从而他们也会觉得和我们共事很开心。”3. Learn names3.记住别人的名字Carnegie says that "names are like company logos," and in today's digital world, people's names may be more important than ever (think social media!).卡内基说，“名字就像公司的logo一样。”在今天这个电子社会，人们的名字比任何时候都更加重要（想一想社交媒体吧！）。"The hundreds of millions of bloggers, tweeters, and Facebookers surely want their voices heard, but they also want their names known."“成千上万的博主，推特主，以及facebook用户一定都希望他们的声音被听到，但他们更希望他们的名字被人们熟知。”Use their names and they are far more likely to remember you.记住他们的名字，他们就会更容易记得你。4. Listen longer4.听得更多Really listening to someone means hearing they say, what they don't say, and what they really mean. To do this, you have to stop interrupting, listen for feelings, repeat what you heard back to the person, acknowledge what the person said, and look for nonverbal clues.真正地倾听别人意味着听他们说了的，他们没有说的，以及他们真正所表达的意思。想要做到这点，你必须停止打断他们，边听边感受，并向他们复述他们说的内容，了解他们说的东西，并寻找一些非语言的细节。"When you listen well you not only make an instant impression, you also build a solid bridge for lasting connections," Carnegie writes. "Who can resist being around a person who suspends his thoughts in order to value yours?"“如果你认真听别人说话，你不但会给对方留下短时的印象，还会建立起长期联系的坚固桥梁。”卡内基写道，“谁会拒绝一个为了尊重你的思想而搁置自己思想的人呢？”5. Discuss what matters to them5.讨论对他们来说重要的事To influence other people, you need to understand what matters to them.为了影响其他人，你必须知道对他们来说什么是重要的事。Carnegie says that "once you know what matters to others through a practice of longer listening, you can then truly engage them by putting such manners at the forefront of your interactions. If you're talking business, this process is about putting the customer back into customer relationship management."卡内基说“一旦你从长期的聆听中得知了对别人来说什么事情重要，你就可以在交流的开始就提及那些东西，来真正引起他们的兴趣。如果你在谈生意，这个过程就是把顾客重新放回顾客关系管理中。”